Tagged Personal Growth

How to Ask For a Raise — Step by Step Advice



How to Ask for a Raise

So you think you’ve earned a raise but no one has coughed up the extra cash. Unfortunately it’s not longer the norm to receive standard annual performance reviews with good ol’ fashioned “standard of living” increases. Seems most often we have to ask. But before you go in, you need to ready with some solid reasons…With my years as a recruiter and manager, I’m going to give you some tips to prepare and lastly I’m going to walk you through “The Conversation.”

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Don’t Make These 5 Career Mistakes


Don’t Make These 5 Career Mistakes

1. Letting others make decisions for you
No matter how well intended, you need to listen to your gut and your heart. Sometimes not making a decision is a decision. Sometimes exercising patience and open mindedness will allow an answer to reveal itself. I wouldn’t spend time taking a bunch of personality tests that supposedly predict your dream job. I’m always plugging one of my favorite apps but try headspace.com for some really simple guided meditation exercises to help clear your mind.

2. Burning a Bridge
Don’t do it. You never know when you’ll run into someone again. Before you shoot your mouth off or leave someone in the lurch, stop and think about 6 months, 1 year or 5 years down the road, ESPECIALLY if you work in a specialized industry. Do the right thing, finish what you started and keep your word.
If you have, fix it…reach out to that person and apologize, write them a handwritten letter and let them know that you regret the way you handled it. I’ve found that saying, I sincerely hope you’ll accept my apology” to be a powerful statement. This gives them the control to decide. Unless your error is severe, I’ve found most willing to accept SINCERE apologies.

3. Taking your job for granted
Phone it in
Thinking you are indispensable
Overstaying your welcome

4. Fighting “The Way Things Are?”
Inflexible – constantly swimming upstream, complaining about the way things are, things are so screwed up does nothing to fix the issues. Make sure you are communicating your concerns to the right people who can actually affect change. Bitching around the water cooler helps no one.
Personal Toll This also takes a toll on your personal life. You might come home crabbier and this will impact your personal relationship.
Diplomacy when you are expressing concerns or greivances to the right peole, you have to be diplomatic. Consider that you most likely don’t have all of the information that create the current conditions. Position your concerns in a way that asks your superiors to help you understand why it’s that way. Most importantly, come in with a solution in mind.

5. Not Setting Personal Goals
Putting career before your personal life. Do you want to live to work or work to live? This is so cliché but it’s too true that you will not be on your death bed feeling grateful for your big paychecks, fancy cars and big houses. Set goals for things that you’d like to accomplish personally whether it’s travel, retirement, hobbies or education…keeping your personal goals in mind and putting those first will help guide your career choices.

Did Debbie Reynolds Die from a Broken Heart?

Debbie Reynolds: Can a Broken Heart Really Kill You?

Many of us read about and were saddened to hear that Carrie Fischer had passed away prematurely from a heart attack. Just as tragic was the news that her 84 year old mother, the famous Debbie Reynolds, died the very next day. Sadly, we’ve heard of stories like these before where the timing sure seems like there is a relationship to the insurmountable grief and their death.

I started to look into it and was surprised to read about Stress Induced Cardio Myopathy, also referred to as the broken heart syndrome. This is a syndrome recognized by the American Heart Association which, for me, certainly adds validity. Basically, stress induced cardio myopathy looks and feels like a heart attack but patients with stress induced cardiomyopathy don’t have blocked arteries which is the most common reason for a heart attack. Death is rare but it does happen, perhaps in the case of Debbie Reynolds. Experts aren’t clear on the science behind why this happens but it’s thought that stress hormones such as adrenaline stuns the heart into abnormal activity.

But what about the spiritual or emotional aspect of a broken heart and death. It’s been reported that before dying Debbie said, “I want to be with Carrie” which to me implies there was some choice on her part in dying. You hear sometimes about elderly folks dying shortly after their spouse of several decades passes away.

it’s my unscientific opinion that one’s mental health is too often overlooked in all aspects of life but especially in the case of mental anguish and severe grief. Not only does stress takes it’s toll on our bodies in serious ways but depression might cause people to not take care of themselves in the usual way. They may abandon exercise routines, eating properly may fall to the wayside causing malnourishment. This might be what people refer to as “giving up”, sort of like they are throwing in the towel. Perhaps the grief is too intense.

However, millions of people survive the death of their loved ones but we generally don’t hear about these stories because they aren’t as romantic or touching or mysterious. Death from stress induced cardiomyopathy is very rare.

I guess in the final analysis, there is no distinct answer whether a broken heart can kill us. I don’t think mental anguish and grief generally directly cause one’s death but it certainly can impact us on serious ways depending on existing conditions and circumstances.

Either way, please visit the American Heart Association at www.heart.org to learn more about heart health..

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