What is Your Relationship to the Thing?
Hey folks, welcome to livemorenow.net. Some of you who have seen my videos, you may have heard me talk about Headspace.com. It’s one of my favorite apps for guided meditation. If you are interested in meditation but have no idea where to begin or how to do it, I cannot recommend this site strongly enough. Anyway, I’ve been currently listening to one of their packs which focuses on sleep. They have all different packs about a variety of issues from being more focused, relationships, depression and so on. So as i’m listening, Andy says even though this pack is about sleep, it’s not really about sleep. It’s about our relationship to that moment whether it’s lying awake in bed unable to sleep or waking in the middle of the night. Then he said, “it’s rarely about the thing (in this case the thing is sleep)…it’s rarely about the thing but our relationship to the thing that dictates our experience.” And this really struck a chord with me because I thought that is so true.
This is not a new concept….it’s been packaged in many different ways before but it’s basically about releasing control and accepting that moment for what it is without judgment. Whether it’s about being able to fall asleep, fighting traffic, money or our jobs, it’s kind of about taking a step back and removing yourself from that emotion for a minute.
Going back to the sleep example, for years and years, as long as I can remember, I needed the television on to fall asleep. Otherwise my mind was too busy with racing thoughts about what I need to do or should be doing or I better fall asleep because I’ve got a hard day tomorrow, all the while, making sleep more and more elusive. And what I’ve been working on, and it’s starting to really work is just being more aware of those thoughts and shutting them down and going to a quiet place in my mind. The more I’ve been doing it, the easier it’s getting and I don’t have the anxiety that comes with not being able to sleep.
So, the next time you are stuck in traffic and you’re ready to flip your lid, think about why…is it because you thinks it’s unfair that you should be sitting in traffic or perhaps these other cars are in your way from reaching your destination even though they are in the very same predicament. Instead try and remove yourself from those thoughts. There is something really relieving when I say, “Oh well, we’re all stuck in this together, I might as well turn on some tunes and go with the flow.” It’s less exhausting when you aren’t resisting the moment you are in.
Like I said in the beginning, this really struck a chord for me and I hope it does for you too. The next time you find yourself upset, remind yourself that it’s rarely about the thing, any thing, and more about your relationship to the thing. Focus on that and you can begin to change the narrative in your mind. Hope you find this helpful as I did. Thanks for visiting livemorenow.net